Not Quite Shining Armor
by Queen
Summary: Kagome is trying to study...really she is....
1. No Armor, Just The Kimono....

Welcome, everyone, to a small rambling of odd thoughts. Not quite an insanity, but the product of me studying too long, then picking up a manga to read on a break, while the brain was still in literary analyzation mode. Due to this, I began to find very odd, small comparisons between my manga and the class I was studying for. This is the result.

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_Not Quite Shining Armor_

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Shard detector.

Shard detector!

He called me a shard detector!

I can't believe it. You know, I've got things to do. School, mainly. Kami-sama, I'm at least a month behind. And Math! Argh! I'll never catch up. You know, I'm chasing Buyo, minding my own business, and now I'm here, and stuck with _him_. Look at him, up in his tree as usual. Sure, he's trying to keep an eye on camp, make sure no more of those freaky youkai come to pick a fight. Of course he'd beat them, but still.

Shard detector!

He called me a shard detector!

Fine, maybe in a very wrong way, that's true. I can find them. But still, how rude. Selfish, arrogant, self-centered hanyou jerk. Feh. I can't even...Feh? Did I just think 'feh'? Great, I've been around him so long I'm starting to sound like him. Hopefully I'll never quite catch his ability to swear a blue streak. Mom would just love that, I'm sure.

Shard detector!

He called me a shard detector!

I thought maybe, just maybe, I was worth a little more than that. I know I'm not exactly the greatest warrior in the world. I'm getting better with my bow. I'll improve. I'll show him who's worthless. Idiot. Either way, he still needs his precious shard detector to find the Shikon no Tama for him. Fine, become a whole youkai, see if I care. When you turn into another Sesshomaru, don't come crying to me.

Shard detector!

He called me a shard detector!

Worthless to him otherwise. Only reason he needs me is to be his shard detector. Feh, you'd think he'd be grateful at least. I got him out of Kikyou's spell. If it weren't for me, he'd still be 'dead'. Idiot, idiot, idiot! Argh!

Now what? Oh, he's looking at me again. Why? Why does he do that? To keep an eye on me? Afraid I'm going to wound myself by sitting still and trying...trying _very hard_...to study? What, can he save me from a papercut? Ignore him. Just ignore him. Let him look. Idiot probably can't read, either. He should learn. Illiterate? He wouldn't survive very long in my world. Time. Whatever. Not without me. He'd get hit by a car or something, eventually. I bet he'd get a kick out of driving- Argh! I've got to stop thinking about Inuyasha. Concentrate, Kagome. Read your book. Study. At least it's not Math, the subject created to torture poor time displaced students.

"_The girl returned to the queen, who would not let her go until she had heard that reply which had filled her heart with joy, for now she knew beyond a doubt that the knight was the one to whom she belonged completely, and she knew, too, that he was fully hers. She told the girl to return at once and tell him that she now ordered and urged him to 'do the best' that he could..._

_'Sir, my lady now orders you to 'do the best' you can.'_

_'Tell her that it would never displease me to do anything that might please her, for I am intent upon doing whatever she may desire.'"_

Oh yeah, sure. Would do anything for his lady love, huh? Right. Supposed to be patient and obedient, do whatever the lady so desires. Unquestioningly. Sure. Knight in shining armor. Never see these people on the road, arguing with each other, do you? Knight in shining armor. He's still up there, arms folded, glaring out at the world. How many times have I seen him smile? Not very many. Always the bad mood. Knight in shining armor. Knight in shining fire-rat kimono. Doesn't exactly work. And whoever heard of a knight who went around and called his lady a shard detector? Jerk. Lady? Me? Feh, I'm not his lady. Stupid, arrogant, self centered jerk. I can at least try to fight, not like some of these 'ladies.' Urp, he saw me looking at him.

Study study study.

"..._strength and courage grew because Love aided him, and because he never before hated anything as much as this adversary_..."

He's still looking at me. Stop looking at me, Inuyasha. It's distracting. Let me read my book, so I won't fail the next test. Stop it...knock it off. It's distracting!

"What?"

"Feh."

Humph. At least he stopped. I think. Uh...quick look? Yes. He did. Good. Okay. Study. Don't think about Inuyasha and his rude mouth. Think about the nice, normal exploits of...medieval Europeans. Yay, what a change of pace. Maybe I can get Inuyasha to fly me over there and see the real thing. Now there would be an interesting situation. I can see it now, Inuyasha versus dragons. And random, wandering knights. We could try to find the Holy Grail instead of the Shikon no Tama. Wouldn't that be a change? Dreamy, wonderful, heroic knights who protect the ladies they love. Watch them and take care of them, even when they sleep. I'd find myself a real, charming Lancelot, and...well, Inuyasha would probably beat him to a pulp. I've really got to concentrate more...

Study study study!

_"We have found it written that between the moon and the earth there is a certain kind of peculiar spirit. If you want to know what they're like- they're partly human and partly celestial. These spirits are known as incubi..."_

No way. What is it with me finding half youkai at every turn? Now Merlin is half a demon. Great. Father is an incubus, in this story. Weird. I wonder why Morgan le Fey is always made into such an evil person if Merlin is half demon, and she's wholly human? Probably because she's a 'weak and powerless female' and any power she has must be eeeevil or demonic something. Not that hanyou can't be good or even noble. Sure, they tend to be rude, crass jerks who don't know how to be nice at all, but still. I wonder...

"Hey, Inuyasha?"

Yeah, don't reply, just give me that look.

"Are there any incubi in Japan?"

"Any _what_?"

Well, that got a response. Ha, I love it when I stump him like that. "It's a kind of youkai," I explained, pointing at my book. Always trying to seem so high and mighty up in that tree. Why does he always sleep up there, anyway?

"Feh. I've never seen one."

Well, that answers that question. Now what? He's looking at me again.

"Why do you want to know?"

"Because there's a half incubus in this story I have to read for school."

He gets the weirdest expressions on his face sometimes. This one looks kind of sour.

"Feh."

Turning back to watching the moon again...

Study study study...

...study...

His hair looks so silver in the moonlight.

Idiot.

Study, dammit!

Shit!

Dammit!

Argh!

Why do I have to keep thinking like he talks? This is driving me insane. And he's looking at me again. Maybe I should 'sit' him. Serve him right. But he really hasn't done anything. Feh, he called me a shard detector! That's right. I'm supposed to be mad at Inu-baka. Stop making embarrassed faces and study your book.

Study study study...

He's still looking at me.

"Kagome?"

"What?" He looks a little hurt. Okay, okay, maybe I was a little sharp. Quieter. I never know what to think when he looks at me like that. I can't guess what's going on in that hanyou head of his. "What?"

"What are you reading?"

Blink blink. "A textbook for class. About knights in...uh...samurai...in Europe."

"Why?"

"Because it's literature." Okay, that was obviously not the correct answer, based on that expression. Do I really want to discuss this stuff with him? He probably wouldn't...hm... Now there's a thought... "And because it's about how great samurai there fight."

His ears perked up a little. Literally. It's kinda funny when they do that. They stick out of his hair a bit more, and kind of swivel around a little bit. Maybe if I can get him curious, I can get him to understand why I need to study. And why I need to go take tests on this stuff. So I can actually, you know, pass some of my classes every once and awhile.

"Feh. Samurai? In Europe? I've heard about some of them, running around in metal clothes."

Yeah, try to look disinterested, Inuyasha. I'm onto you. "Well, their armor does seem silly." He turned around and began to ignore me again, resettling himself. "Of course," I added thoughtfully, looking at the page again, "Arthur had some pretty strong magic to get Excalibur."

The ears did that cute perking thing again.

"What's an Excalibur?"

"A magical sword that can cut though anything." Okay, I don't know if that's totally true, but it is a legendary sword and all. It's got to have some powers.

"Feh."

He's got a hand on the Tetsusaiga, I just know it.

"He drew it out of a stone. No one else could pull it out. He's the only one who can use it." You know, in a weird way, that sounds familiar. Almost. Sorta kinda maybe. Not. Well. I pulled the Tetsusaiga out. But Inuyasha uses it.

"Why?"

"It makes him King."

"Feh."

Folds arms, settles in tree... "And then later, they go on the Grail Quest." He's still listening. Just not looking. I can tell. "The Grail has the ability to purify. I'm not though with that part yet."

He's...just sitting there now...maybe I was wrong...maybe he's not listening. I thought maybe...what am I thinking about? Why should such a self-centered, pig headed...

"Do they get the Grail thing?"

Huh?

"The Grail thing? Do they get it?"

"I...in the end... Yes...I think so. I haven't finished that chapter yet."

"And you have to take a 'test' thing on this too?"

Wow, he actually remembered that I have a life outside the Sengoku Jidai. I do believe I've just witnessed a miracle. "Yes..."

"Feh. It'll probably take those stupid samurai years to find their Grail thing."

What am I supposed to say to that? Encouragement? 'Yes, Inuyasha, the stupid knights took years and most didn't come back? Most died in vain?' Great, just great. Ha. They didn't have a grail detector or anything. No one to point out and say, 'go fetch us that Grail!'

Shard detector!

He called me a shard detector!

Ooooh, I should 'sit' him...I'd feel so much better...

"If they had any sense, they would have found someone who knew where to look for the thing in the first place."

...it's okay to be vindictive some- what?

"They probably roamed all over the place like a bunch of stupid humans. Feh."

Scowl. That wasn't the context he called me a shard detector in. Jerk. He did not mean it as if I were the best way to find the Shikon no Tama. How many times have I heard him say, 'I can do it myself?' If he thinks I'm going to stop being mad at him over that, then he's...

"Did I piss you off or something?"

There are times, you know, when I want to rip his head off. Sit just doesn't cover it. "Never mind."

I might as well try to get some rest. More questing tomorrow, after all. Mmm, nice, warm sleeping bag. Comfy...

I think...I think he's watching me sleep.

I wonder if maybe I should have explained the concept of chivalry to him.

Then again...maybe I don't need to.

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I usually plan how fics go...this just sorta floated along...o.O; Anyway, the texts Kagome is reading are Chretien de Troyes' _'Lancelot, or, The Knight of the Cart_' and Wace's _'Roman de Brut_.' (Guess what I just got done reading for class...) Chances are Kagome will not be reading these texts at her grade level.

Speaking of reading texts, I've really got to go read about Gawain now...

So, until next storytime.

~Queen


	2. The Return of the Textbook!

Welcome back, to a second chapter of what was once simply a one-shot fanfic. It's still not really a full-length story, so I'm not sure what that makes this. A two-shot? lol, I think I just created a whole new genre. I was toying around with the idea of a second part to this, and then I started getting a couple reviews asking for a bit more. So I went ahead with it. The rating of the fic has been upped, mainly due to Inuyasha's...ah, 'vocabulary.'

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_Not Quite Shining Armor_

_(the return of the textbook!)_

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Shit.

You know, a minute ago, I thought she was pissed at me, and now she's all smiley while she sleeps. Feh. Hell, she'd probably be pissed if she knew I was watching her. Can't understand her half the time. Feh, half the time? Try none of the time. Nothing about her makes any sense. Wish she'd get it through her thick full-human skull that finding the Shikon no Tama is more important than her damn 'tests' or whatever. And 'school.' Feh. If Naraku gets ahold of the thing, who knows what he'll do with it? And won't that change her world, too, if stuff gets messed up here? Last thing I need to worry about is her going to someplace full of Naraku-minions. She'd get herself killed in a minute without me.

Still sleeping. Good. Feh, she's no use if she's reeling around exhausted in the morning.

Damn, this would be so much easier if she didn't look like Kikyou.

Don't know how I mistook Kagome for her the first time. Feh. I must have had a cold or something. Stuffing up my nose. And I was still pinned to that damn tree. Kagome's eyes are bigger. Wider. And her scent's different. Cold. Yeah, I must have been sick or something.

Anyway.

Huh?

Oh, she's turning over. Feh.

I wonder what that was all about earlier, about the samurai.

Feh...hn.

Shit.

Okay, what the hell is this thing she's reading?

Careful, don't wake her up. Yeah, sit over here...

Flip flip flip.

If she gets pissed that I'm looking at it, it's her fault for leaving it out. It better not be some sort of spellbook thing. I bet she wonders if I can read her fancy books or not. Feh. Smirk. Show her who's a stupid hanyou. Let's see here...

_"While blocking the slash, the Knight of the Surcoat took the blow on his shield, unsheathed his sword, cut off the head of the beast as it was raging at him, and left it rolling around in its own blood..."_

Huh. What's that word Kagome uses sometimes?

Oh yeah.

Cool.

Feh. I could take him. Don't care how nice his sword is, the Tetsusaiga's better. Course, this bastard would have to be trying to hurt Kagome for me to use it, but then I'd have to kick his ass regardless. Feh, human samurai are weak. And European ones? Feh. Wonder what the incubus guy could do...

Flip flip flip...

Ugh, what happened to her book? Parts are all some nasty yellow color. Makes them stick out...oh. Maybe that's the point. If she's got to remember it or something. Feh. For her precious 'tests.' Maybe I should ask why those things are so damn important. Of course, then she'd really think I was stupid, not knowing.

Flip flip...

Blink.

Is that a frickin' picture of me? Kagome drew a little guy with dog ears next to the nasty yellow shit? She needs to learn how to draw. Feh. What the hell is she drawing a picture of me for...?

_"We have found it written that between the moon and the earth there is a certain kind of peculiar spirit. If you want to know what they're like- they're partly human and partly celestial. These spirits are known as incubi..._

_They are not capable of great evil, and they can't hurt us, except to tease and annoy us..._

_This is the way that Merlin was fathered and probably born..."_

Oh. The incubus guy. Hanyou. Squint squint. What's she got written here...

_'not quite IY-funny though. Why I find so many 1/2's_?'

IY? Oh. Me. Duh.

Well, at least she doesn't forget about me when she goes back to her world. I didn't see her doodling earlier. Feh, comparing some mortal's powers to mine? What the hell did this guy do?

_"King," said Merlin, "don't you realize that brains are better than brawn? Strength is fine, but cunning is much better, since it often succeeds where muscles fail..._

_"Move away," shouted Merlin, "for your strength won't do a thing. Now see what craft and cunning can accomplish that bodily strength cannot. "Then he walked forward and stood gazing around. He moved his lips like a man uttering a prayer... Then he shouted to the Britons: "Come over here! Come on! Now you can pick up these rocks and carry them down to the ships..."_

_The Britons call this the Giant's Carol in their tongue; in English the name of the place is Stonehenge; in French it is "Hanging Rocks."_

Oh. Uh, I guess he did some big shit after all. Well, can't expect less from another half demon. He definitely talks big enough. Too bad he doesn't sound like he can kick ass, too. Just use his powers. I wonder why. Maybe those incubus things are like kitsune or something. Feh. Flip flip...

More doodles...huh?

_"...occupied the entrance to the cave and overcame the hag with his knife Carnwennan and cut her in half, so that she became two tubs of blood..."_

Ow. That had to hurt.

More written in the margin...uh..._'Ow- had to hurt- sounds like something Fluffy'd do'_?

Who the hell is Fluffy?

Blink.

Holy shit! Ha! Sesshomaru'd piss his pants if he heard that! Heh, have to remember that one...heh heh heh...

Feh. Well. Grail Quest thing...flip flip flip...more of the nasty yellow colored stuff on the page...feh. She got a really funky expression when I asked about it. Maybe a lot of them died trying to find it or something. Shit, if she's worried about dying, she's nuts.

I won't let you die.

Feh.

Maybe...are you worried about me dying?

Idiot.

Damn.

I hate this. I really, really hate this. I suck at this stuff. What stuff? Hell. Twitch twitch. Scratch. I'd better get out of here. Well, back to my tree, anyway. I can keep an eye on her from there. And if she wakes up or something, I'd probably get a 'sit' for getting so close.

Hn. Well, she left the book out. But she usually packs everything up. Uh...shit. Do I put it away for her, or do I just leave it out? Um...hell. Her pack thing is open. I'll just stick it inside.

Rummaging...

Holy shit, it's alive!

Shit! She woke up. Dammit, I thought you slept hard!

"Ano...Inuyasha?"

"What the hell is that thing?"

"Thing? What..."

Rubbing eyes...damn, I didn't want to wake you up. Great. Just great. You left the damn book out in the first place! "What the hell is with all the noise?"

"It's just my cd player..."

What's a cd player? Is that where the music's coming from? _...sleepless night expresses my thoughts of you. "That's what love is" it whispers...?_ What the hell is she listening to? Sappy court music?

_"Don't suddenly look so indifferent!_

_Because we can overcome whatever may get in our way..."_

She's smiling...what, she likes the sappy song? Well, at least it's not a slow sappy court song. Feh. Huh, press the button on the round thing. Good. Song was weird anyway. Yeah. Put it away.

"Inuyasha..." rubbing eyes... "why were you going through my stuff?"

She doesn't look pissed yet. Yet. Uh... "You left your book out. I was just putting it back!" Yeah, way to sound defensive.

"Oh..."

She's still half asleep. Damn, she's getting out of her blanket thing. She's sitting next to me? Uh...why?

"Thanks. Hey, Inuyasha?"

What? Shut up, Inuyasha, shut up, just shut up. Sit down. Yeah. She'll stop looking like that if I just ignore her. Damn she smells nice. Shit. Sit still. Don't look at her. Yeah.

"Were you watching me..." yawns... "sleep?"

"Feh."

Look at how nice and interesting the moon is. Ignore the girl. Ignore...feh. She's smiling. Heh. Good.

"Thanks...Inu...mmm..."

Huh? Kagome, what are you...

Oh.

Uh...

Is she asleep? Oh shit. She _is_ asleep. Kagome? Uh...Kagome? Shit...uh...damn it! She's not supposed to sleep against me! Shit! Uh...heh. Hn. Hey, she can't get pissed if she's the one who fell asleep against me. Feh. Yeah. Um...look at how nice and interesting the moon...shit. I can't leave her like this. Idiot! Um...uh...well...yeah, just sit here for a few minutes, Inuyasha. She looks so peaceful. She must be tired. Feh. Humans...well. I wonder how hard these test things are anyway. She worries about them more than the Shikon no Tama. Maybe she has to work as hard for them as for the tama.

Um...no, I can't wake her up. Um...heh. Maybe I should...? Yeah, she's pretty light.

There.

Blanket thing back over her. Now what's this metal tab thing on the side? Makes some weird noise when she moves it...zip? Zip. Yeah. There. Oh yeah. 'Zipper.' Idiot. She said that word once. Well.

Feh.

Now what?

Great. She puts away the music thing, and still leaves the book out. Well, this time I'm not touching her bag. The thing's alive. Seriously weird shit in there. Good food though.

Flip flip flip...

I wonder what she sees in these samurai guys, anyway. I could take one of these wimpy samurai in a second. Except maybe the Surcoat guy. He sounded like he could kick some ass. For a human, anyway. Might actually fight him. Huh? A smiley face and more notes next to the yellow stuff...

_'I wish- so sweet- knight in shining armor...'_

Knight in shining armor?

What's that?

Whatever it is, I bet I can do the same thing.

Feh.

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I wanted to say thank you to everyone who's reviewed! Especially since this is my first experimentation in the realm of _Inuyasha_ fanfiction. I've been doing _Sailor Moon_ for awhile now, but I guess you can say I'm 'branching out' a bit. ^_~ What's really weird is that I realized that my first _Sailor Moon_ fanfic was also Arthurian-based. o.O;;; How's that for inspiration?

Anyway, let's see. The song that starts playing on Kagome's cd player is _'1/3'_ by Siam Shade. It's from the _Rurouni Kenshin_ soundtrack. (Another series I got into at the same time as _Inuyasha_...) I thought the words fit in well, so I threw them in too.

The texts Inuyasha read are, in order of appearance:

1. _'The Rise of Gawain, Nephew of Arthur'_ by Mildred Leake Day

2. _'Roman de Brut'_ by Wace

3. Another selection from _'Roman de Brut'_

4. _'Culhwch and Olwen'_ trans. by Richard M. Loomis

Til next storytime.

-Queen


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